Work Less, Mother More

I began to work part-time this year. Theoretically, I have “stolen” 14 hours from the work week to devote to my kids’ playtime and mealtimes. But the truth is, my list of responsibilities in the office is not shorter while my motherhood list is getting longer.

This is something new that I am doing: Work “less,” mother more. Pretty challenging, I would say. My past experience as a stay-at-home mum hasn’t helped much. Back then there was only one child. I have two now, and the only thing I’m armed with is numbness to hectic-ness.

My new tasks include dragging my P1 child from slumber-land at 6.30AM. It has been 10 weeks of school altogether, 10 weeks of racing with the rising sun. I never thought it would be so difficult to awaken her without spoiling her mood and mine. She hates to fight against the sleep devil. Who doesn’t?

It gets more daunting in the morning sometimes when I think we are ready to leave the house and the girl shrieks, “Mummy, I haven’t finished my homework!”

If our morning episodes are fun, the second part of my day is pretty exciting too. Work tends to overrun by an hour or so beyond my official working hours. When I think it’s over, more things come up. At the same time, I’ve discovered that my work computer isn’t any faster than computers from 10 years ago. My brain works faster. It is extremely nerve-wracking waiting for Powerpoint slides to be saved or opened, knowing I am still in the office and my girls are waiting for me. I dash out from the office to the bus stop to the train station to home to cook dinner for four by 5PM. Then I pick up the girls and we bid the babysitter goodbye and swing by the playground. Dinner is served at 7.

The excitement continues after dinner when I sit down with Jiejie to study hanyu pinyin, addition, and subtraction and to remind her to concentrate. It kills me when she doesn’t listen to me and repeatedly writes her “w” as “W,” or pens her name without her surname, or gets distracted from her Math book and starts peeling off stickers from her desk. Arrghh… Not to mention that my little “Bomber” is very curious and wants to scribble on her Jiejie’s book.

Shrieking and whining are now “music” to my ears. It is a great relief to me that the daddy helps out here and there, doing the laundry, washing dishes, or attending to one of the girls. I call it a day when the bedtime story is done. Usually I doze off before the kids do.

It is exhaustion day after day, in exchange for hearing them call me “Mummy” more. There are moments where I’ve almost burst into tears, and moments where I felt defeated and couldn’t do anything except give in to meltdowns.

But when I see the girls home before sunset, cozily on the sofa with a book or a bottle of milk while waiting for dinner to be served, it reminds me of why I want to do this.

* I like my job. I learn new things constantly, my boss is understanding, and my colleagues are great people. They told me the reality is that kids grow up eventually, hence work is essential. It’s disturbing for them to see me take a pay cut just to gain a bit more time with the girls. However, I do make them envious when I leave the office early every day.

Pack Food for Recess

I am busy with a new routine: prepare simple food for my P1 child to consume during her recess time.  

Everyday!

It is fun to mix & match and create one unique combination everyday.

And I start to be attentive to the frozen department of supermarket and hunt for proper food for packing. Food that in favor of my fussy little eater. Food that is easy and quick in preparation.

Apple, cashew nuts and raisins are her favourite and hence regular in the pack.

Sushi is just done when there is left-over rice and Tamanoi Sushinoko, when I am up much earlier.

Sometime, I feel smug on my creation.

Sometime, I get lazy and just chuck in a bun and a choice of her snack.

The truth is, she never able to finish all of it. She plans well and usually take second part of her recess time for play. Often, she shares with her friends, 'cause the friend(s) asked for it. Yup, she is pretty honest with me on this part. I would just remind her that, "you suppose to eat most of it, not your friend". The bottom line is, I know what she eats in school and there is communication establish, like "Eclair for tomorrow?"

Happy me.

Showcasing Her Work, Once Again

Towards the end of last year,

we were called to meet the teachers.

We chat.

We thank the teachers.

We bid goodbye.

She had a wonderful time altogether. 

As part of the conclusion of her learning journey with them for a very good 3 years,

we were handed over a stack of her works and progress reports.

I realized that it is an end to her preschool journey.

I tasted first bite of bittersweet as a mother.

My little baby is no longer a preschooler.

I flipped through her works.

Some are really cute,

some are messy;

some are whimsy,

some put a smile on my face. 

And I wonder how to treasure them all.

I showcase them!

some of them.

Her work during her preschool time.

In my kitchen.

A celebration to a marvelous milestone! 

For the longest time it can be!

Wrapping up, 2011!

Just to sum up my 2011, like previous years did. But first of all, I have to confess that my version of project 365 failed terribly. It stopped short at Jul 2011: Feeding for the longest time till I did another one for jotting Little Bomber's milestone in December (like 2 weeks ago..?!). I was too greedy and wanted to do too many things for the past whole year: fighting with needle and thread, dancing with spatula and mixer, not forgetting constant mind games with my girl(s) on creative conversation and soon to become siblings rivalry. But one thing I have been keeping up is writing the diary! another form of keeping the record of the girls besides digital scrapbookingi.

Good and bad, for juggling so many things. Hubby has to get all the blames when things go wrong.  

JAN:
Remarkable start of the year for us to learn (or for my case to re-learn) how to make rice-ball and spent a wonderful time in KL with family and old friends came by one after another to laugh and hug:).

FEB:
Chinese New Year family reunion and celebration. We were surrounded with lots of love and laughter. 

MAR:
Marked Little Bomber's first year. Well, marked my 35th birthday too. We had a staycation in JB to celebration hers and my birthday. Nothing much to talk about, I mean my birthday. I thought more about the girls now... 

This time of the year, Jiejie participated another round of wushu test, she passed it and elevated into intermediate class.

APR:
Have to pat my self on the back about picking up sewing skill from basic again, and revived the padded seat for the old stroller of ours. Little Bomber officially is an toddler!

MAY:

Unexpectedly, I had to deal with an office crisis and painfully accepted the true fact of Jag's leaving. Life is unpredictable!

JUNE:
 Together with my parents, we travelled to Hong Kong for our annual getaway. Delightfully, Little Bomber started to call me "mama", mutterly.

JUL:
Went back to Kulim without exhausted our selves for almost 10 hours of driving. Jiejie made a remarkable statement for our trip. Little Bomber started to attempt and accomplish something new, like feeding her self with porridge. 

AUG:

We were daunted by the registration system for local primary school. But honestly, it is a fair game. 

SEPT:
This year, I did not post any entry about Jiejie's birthday celebration. But this was the very 1st time, we had it twice: one with her K2 class and another (party) with family members and friends. Well, it was a barbecue and we prepared the food by no-catering service. A big thanks to SC's aunt and Little Bomber's babysitter. I baked a brownie and most of the time, stuck with unwell Bomber. I should digiscrap this wonderful party! 

OCT:
Sad to say goodbye to my grandma forever. Life will not be the same any more, for most of us.

NOV:
We attended Jiejie Graduation Concert. Contentedly sighed on her growth and milestone thus far.

And every Saturday, Jiejie attended extra training for an wushu performing early December. I was like a old lady riding on a skating board, tried to control my tone and temper in order to encourage her to join in the group. She was horrified by the momentum of the training, at the same time in doubt of her ability to do well.  

DEC:
Well, She completed the wushu show. Could be better, if you wonder. Received the best Christmas gift:), hence embarking a slight different journey with my family.

Conclusion? Life is short, seize the day! And certainly hope I will do it better this year. Slow down perhaps....

Happy New Year, y'all.

Dec 2011: Smiles

Looking back 2011, I supposed to digi-scrapbook once a month, at least.

To capture the wonderful moments of the girls.

But my last layout was in July. 

Pretty embarrassing. 

That I over estimate my capability in juggling so many things at one time. 

Time to re-position and re-strategy. Re-learn too.

Credits: Che Yang Designs and Yoshiko Designs

Oatmeal-Chocolate Chip (and walnuts) Cookies

Sounds healthier, right? 

Pretty easy too, CS! [yes, the recipes is for you=)] 

Just need to mix the ingredients together and drop the dough on the cookies sheet (tray) for baking.

Ingredients

1 ½    cups packed brown sugar 1        cup butter or margarine, softened 1        teaspoon vanilla 1        egg 2        cups quick-cooking oats (I used Quaker brand) 1 ½    cups Gold Medal® all-purpose or unbleached flour 1        teaspoon baking soda ¼       teaspoon salt 1        cup semisweet chocolate chips (6 oz) 1        cup chopped nuts, if desired (I used walnuts, crushed) Method

·                Heat oven to 350°F ·                In a large bowl, stir brown sugar and butter until blened. ·                Stir in vanilla and egg until light and fluffy. ·                Stir in oats, flour, baking soda and salt; stir in chocolate chips and nuts. ·                Onto ungreased cookies sheet, drop dough by rounded tablespoonfuls about 2 inches apart. ·                Bake 9 to 11 minutes or until golden brown. Cool slightly; remove from cookie sheet to wire rack.

I got the recipes from here. [the page includes nutrition information]

Full strength to stir the ingredients.

A rainy Saturday afternoon. I was alone at home with two, SC was called to work urgently. 

On a typical stay-home weekend, she refused to take afternoon nap like little Bomber. So to keep her busy and stop asking about watching Winx Club from iPad, I got her involved. She wanted to make cookies instead of cake. 

While cookies were baked one batch after another, we read 1 chapter of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Coincidentally, Bomber's nap was a short one. I then multi-tasked to bring out raisin, water, grapes, anything I can find from the fridge as afternoon snack while reading the chapter. 

As a result of running in and out of the kitchen, I wasted some dough and got some over-burnt cookies...

Burnt cookies tucked at the back... keeping it for my self to consume.

Though it doesn't look pretty, it was irresistibly yummy. (I could not resist from munching it while it was just out from oven even though I was having sore throat). Intend to give some to Yvonne who handed-me-down some P1 books and one of Jiejie's teacher. 

Children Book Picks: Maurice Sendak

We had a playdate the other day.

Layla took out Where the Wild Things are and read-aloud to Jiejie right before our leaving. I was impressed with her able to read the book independently.

The plot of the book is based on the fantasy (and real) consequences of a little boy's mischief. One night Max dresses up in his wolf suit and does all kinds of things he shouldn't, like chasing the dog with a fork. His mother scolds him and calls him a "WILD THING!" Max is so mad he shouts back, "I'LL EAT YOU UP!" As a result, his mother sends him to his bedroom without any supper.

I observed timid Jiejie seemed didn't get frighten by the Wild Things in the book.

So I tried to search for the book in library after that, but could only found the other two of Mr Sendak's classic: In the Night Kitchen and Very Far Away.

Jiejie didn't agree to borrow those 2 books at first looked at the covers.

It looks oldies and oddly bland, especially Very Far Away. She then changed her mind after I finished reading about the little cowboy.

Both feature boys differently; one in his dream adventure in a surreal baker's kitchen, and the other is a boy dressing in cowboy hat and boots running away because of not being listened to. 

It was interesting to read how each and every story brilliantly captures the child's feeling and fantasies. Some of the illustrations are dark, some are being criticised, like The Hungry Readers said about In the Night Kitchen.

But I like how brave Mickey is to tell the bakers that "I'm not the milk and the milk's not me! I'm Mickey!"

I also like the end of the other 2 books when both boys realised they ain't angry anymore and justified them selves to return to their mothers."And then Mama will tell me what refined means and why horses dream and why cats ever sing when they don't know how." Martin ran all the way home. 

It was very much later I found the translated version of Where the Wild Things Are：野兽出没的地方 =).

We are immersed into Maurice Sendak's world, a fantasy world that shows true feelings of a child. At the same time, I learn about dark emotions and fantasies of a child.

Thanks to Mama Evelyn. She seems to have very good pick in classic children books and books based on real people as well as having fun with books.

Food = Life

Recently, there have been an article published that reported that we have reach world population of 7 billion people. What really sobering from this article is that 1 billion people are in hunger everyday. This year, 6 million children might die from hunger related causes, if no help is given to them. 

While I was listening to the news about the 7 billion population in SC's car, on my way to office, it reminded me that, humanity used the equivalent of 1.5 planets to support its activities currently. I felt uneasy about sad reality world.


Not all children are equally fed with sufficient amount of food and aided with right resources. We should simplify our living in this part of the world. We should not pamper our children with too much toys, wearing and food. I should start to re-organise & de-cluttering my way of living. I should continue the effort to go green.


Knowing a child dies from hunger every 2.3 seconds, I was weeping, sadly, from this video to that video. 


Lately, fussy little eater Jiejie's frequently used phrase is "not fair", as she sees unfairness treatment on her self. So much as she used it as an excuse to skip her hot serving food: how not fair it was that she got so much more amount of food in her plate. Frankly she eats like a cat, but I spent too much energy in the kitchen to make effort to attract her appetite. Sometime, I bribed her with ice cream after meal, or waited till she willingly to eat. I am not a sweet nice mummy all the time, I got angry sometime too and would put her in thinking corner to cry out loud (as if it helps to consume her energy and make her eat more). Last week we all were sick one after another, my patience seemed shorter limit than usual, and together with the hungry children news that was kept in my mind, I told her that I should have chuck her in Africa if she mumble again on "not fair" to be asked to eat.


She is so fortune to be here and served with variety of meals!


But I reckon she had little clue about what I said until I showed her Children's Hunger Fund. She asked many whys and hows: why children have no food to eat; how disaster destroys a home shelter; how precious is clean water to a community; why food is scarcely to some family... She may not grasp the entire picture of what happen beyond her comfort zone, but she wasn't hesitate to contribute some money for helping to buy food for the poor children.


I just hope she cherish with what she has and will not abuse using the phrase "not fair" from now on. 


We all have be reminded for not taking things for granted, continuously!

^ ^ ^ ^ ^ ^

A group of mommy bloggers are coming together to create awareness for this dire situation and raise funds to help hungry kids around the world. Through Children’s Hunger Fund. With US 5 cents, it’s enough to provide a meal to a hungry child.

So I am appealing to you for your participation in this little fund raising activity. All you need to do is this:

1. Crop and paste any of this above information or pictures on your blog site, together with this logo (just right click and save image in your hard drive or copy the html for this to add as a widget to your site)

<a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/catchfortywinks/6308510246/" title="CHF by catch40winks, on Flickr"><img src="http://farm7.static.flickr.com/6045/6308510246_604f399a76.jpg" width="250" height="87" alt="CHF"></a>

2. Appeal for friends and readers on your site to go directly to this page to make direct contributions. All it takes is US $5.00 for 100 meals for the children. Of course, it will be great if you can contribute more. You can also go to this page to make a direct contribution to areas that are most needed; like disaster relief. 

3. Organise your own fund raising activity. 

There are plenty of ideas that you can adopt to raise the funds;
- Bake sale
- Make and Sell a product
- Give up a birthday gift
- Lose weight by missing a meal and contributing what you might have spent on the meal to the Children's Hunger Fund

4. If you have a preschooler or a child who has learnt to save some money, talk to him/her to see if he can give a little of his money to help to feed hungry children.

Children's Hunger Fund is a Christian nonprofit organization that works to alleviate the suffering of children in impoverished regions across America and around the world. Since CHF began in 1991, many with their donations have helped them distribute more than $927 million in food and other resources to serve the needs of more than 10 million children in thirty-five U.S. states and seventy-two countries worldwide. Charity should transcend religion and race, help us and Children's Hunger Fund to show a child in some remote corner of our world that he/she is loved. THANK YOU. 

Do drop me a note if you are interested to participate and will be putting this fund raiser activity up on your blog or FB page. My deepest appreciation and thanks in advance for your kind and giving contribution to Children's Hunger Fund!

When the child is unwell, we learn Q for Quilt

Jiejie has not been unwell for the longest time.

It was probably the rain on Saturday triggered her sensitive lungs and caught a cold. Hence started coughing again yesterday morning, feverish in the middle of last night. She burst into tears since then, telling us she was in great pain. I had no choice but to absent at work again, for different reason though.

Anyway, after visited doctor early in the morning and slept through till lunch time. She seems so much better and started to request if she could go back to her class again in the afternoon. How can? Childcare leave counted as 1 full day, no half day, my dear. I then realised that she has no interest to sleep again. Her eyes were wide opened starring at the ceiling. I tried to avoid the television show for her. So I dug out Jann's Phonics' material and flipped. Decided to do the activity for 'Q for Quilt'. 

First, craft work: Paste cloth (alternate pattern) on soft cloth as quilt. 3 X 4 pieces of fabric, contributed by Jann and my limited fabric stash. But I improvised and let Jiejie had a little fun to sew it like a patchwork with the sewing machine. She was very enthusiasm at the beginning but died off half way of sewing. Can't really blame her, she ain't her usual self. I completed the work in the end.  

Second, story time on The Magic Quilt. She was happy and into this: Get ready duck headband, queen's crown and the craft quilt. I read the storyline that was prepared by Jann. Jiejie insisted to be the Queen and so, Little Bomber is the ducky... the one without the noisy quacking. 

• Once upon a time, there was a farmer with a group of duckies (put duck headband on child). 
• But there is one little duck that quack very loud and will lead the other duckies to quack all day long. (Child to quack... and quack...). They were never quiet. 
• One day, the farmer was tired and he needed a Quiet peaceful rest. He yelled, "QUIET! QUIET! STOP QUACKING!" But the duckies continue to quack. (Child to quack... and quack...). 
• While the duckies were noisily quacking away, a Queen (Mummy put on the crown) passed by. She heard the quacking and wanted to help the farmer. 
• The queen took out a Magic Quilt (the craft quilt) and told the farmer that if he raise up the quilt, the duckies would keep quiet. So the queen raised the quilt up and the duckies stopped quacking and were QUIET! (Prompt child by putting fingers on lips) But when she took the quilt down, they started to quack noisily again (Child to quack... and quack...). The queen again raised the quilt up and the duckies kept quiet.
• Finally, the farmer hung the quilt in the farm and the duckies stopped quacking. At last, the farm was quiet again and the farmer can have a good quiet rest so everyone is very happy.

Thirdly, pretend-play: used the craft quilt to cover Jiejie, pat her and sing "Are you sleeping". At the same time, I pat Little Bomber too. I usually don't pat them to sleep, but I reckon this time 1 was just taken the medicine & the other kid was tired, both dozed off at 4 plus in the afternoon.

Her condition was rather like riding on a roller coaster. She became teary after dinner and cranky. "No" was the only word I don't wish to hear more but she kept repeating it. Somehow, when she is ill, it also means both of us on EQ test. It was a busy day on remote desktop connection and 2 kids, thank God that MIL is here to help around. As she's got sensitive lungs, I began her Ventolin and Flixotide puffers to ease her breathing.

Let's hope that she will be better tomorrow.

Side note... I am now game into making a proper quilt like expert Yvette:o)...

Learning Compassion Early through Volunteerism by Emily Patterson

This is a guest post. Thanks Emily for sharing with us about teaching children to volunteer.

Submitted on behalf of Primrose Schools: preschool working to be the best in education and child by Emily Patterson (@epatt1062)

In a world where television highlights spoiled teens or the extravagant lifestyles afforded to rich children, many parents are seeking ways to counteract such images and ideas by raising more compassionate and caring children.

Many parents seek to do this by teaching volunteerism to their children while they are young and giving them an earlier start on helping others.

Volunteering can play an important part in building a child's character and establish a positive habit, rather than a bad one. Working together at volunteer work with their child can allow parents precious bonding time, while making an impact in their communities that a child will certainly notice and be proud to have done.

One of the first steps to getting a child involved through volunteering is not about the child at all. Instead, the parents should address their own goals for getting their children to volunteer. What sorts of organizations do the parents want the children to be involved with? What kinds of lessons do they hope their children will learn? Choosing a cause that is meaningful to the family is a good start in this direction.

With a broader group of organizations in mind, parents can begin narrowing that list down to those that are appropriate for a given child's age. Some activities might be very meaningful, but they may be difficult for a child to understand or even find ways to participate. When they can see the results of their work, they are more likely to grasp the idea. Also keep in mind that young children do well in group activities and are capable of following instructions.

The third step narrows the list down further. While some activities may be wonderful learning experiences for children, the atmosphere or organization itself may not necessarily be child-friendly. Parents should research a group's staff and history to understand if their children would be welcome.

Having planned these parts out will make the final step much easier on parents: Explaining to the children about volunteerism and the contribution that can be made to the community as well as the type of work the child may do at a specific organization. Once a parent has established an answer to these questions for himself or herself, it is much easier to answer that most-popular question in a child's vocabulary: "Why?"

Teaching a child to volunteer benefits both the hear-and-now and the near future. A compassionate, giving child is much more likely to one day become a compassionate, giving adult.